Before you panic, this is Jefferson and Prof. Shelly, not Alex and Bethany.
Around when Jumanji Welcome to The Jungle came out I watched/read a bunch of theories about it despite not having seen the movie. I just like movie theories. People theorized that perhaps the jungle in Jumanji was a real cursed place and that all the people were real people forced to act out the same action over and over until someone broke the spell, which also meant the “playable characters” were actually people who were being possessed by the players.
People were also speculating about how many of Spencer, Martha, Fridge, Bethany and Alex’s actions were them, and how many were the characters’. It was pretty obvious when Dr. Smolder and Ruby’s personalities poked their heads out, so either Prof. Shelly didn’t have a personality or he was already pretty effeminate making him almost indistinguishable from Bethany.
Same for the relationships. Did Spencer and Martha really love each other before they played the game or did they only fall in love because the characters/real people were in a relationship? They say they did, but that might be Jumanji warping their small crush into fullblown love. The person making the theory used Bethany and Alex as an example. They fall in love very quickly in the game but seem to snap out of it as soon as they leave it (avoiding the inappropriate relationship that would follow)
Putting all that together it stands to reason that in the world of Jumanji there’s a cool pilot who makes killer margaritas who fell in love with a chubby, effeminate, middle aged professor, and if that isn’t the cutest shit, I don’t know what is.
Tag: hey queue there
And they did.
In one story a man goes to visit Freyr for a few weeks but leaves after only a few days because Freyr’s house is filled with gay men which makes the guy super uncomfortable, so it’s absolutely a valid interpretation that Freyr is god of queer men and bisexual himself, considering that he falls head over heels in love with the jotun woman Gerd.
Odin is said to be Tyr’s father in one text, but in another text its Hymer. Neither Odin’s wife Frigg or Hymer’s wife Hrodr are said to me his mother. When Loki is accused of being slutty and sleeping with a bunch of men in one story, Loki says Odin used to do that too. Jotun men can get pregnant, and if you put all that together you can absolutely make a case for Tyr having the manliest family tree ever.
In Lokasenna Tyr and Freyr appears to be close, and you can see why.
Considering that The Collector is one of the oldest beings in the universe he is surprisingly weak. He’s no stronger than your average human and just as easy to wound. His powers mainly seem to consist of being immortal and incredibly rich. When he is in his human form that is. He has another form that’s this huge monster of a creature that’s incredibly strong and fast. Why doesn’t he just use that all the time? Because he thinks it’s ugly.
The Kinkster part is because he fucking looks like one.
Three chubby/fat Disney witches: Ursula from The Little Mermaid, Madam Mim from The Sword in The Stone, and Orwen from The Black Cauldron.
I modernized their designs a tiny bit and tried to make them look like they’re all members of the same coven or something.
Don’t think I didn’t notice that the only two X-Force members who were still standing by the end of the movie were also the two people Cable dated in the comics. And if you still think Cable and Deadpool never dated you absolutely missed the point when Deadpool was asked what his relation to Cable was and he responded “Don’t ask, don’t tell”. That was him saying “We’re dating but we’re not allowed to show it because then fuckboys will make a scene”. Not being allowed to show it certainly didn’t stop Deadpool from TALKING about it though. A lot.
Anyway, I think I prefer movie Cable to comic Cable just because he doesn’t seem to suffer from that tiring messiah complex. It’s also incredibly refreshing to see Cable flirt with Deadpool in a sort of “It pisses me off that I’m attracted to you” way instead of it always being Deadpool chasing Cable.
The highly unconventional family of Deadpool. I left Weasel and Vanessa out on purpose because I’m not entirely sure if they’re supposed to be part of the family. I can imagine Weasel being like “Oh god no keep me out of whatever this is” and Vanessa’s place in the universe is uncertain.
I thought about labeling them “Cool Aunt” and so on, but to be honest I think they defy that sort of thing.
The ship name for Cable/Deadpool, Cablepool, actually comes from the comics. It’s a persona Deadpool takes on for a short period because Cable is unavailable. It looks like a mix of the two characters and I tried taking inspiration from it for this.
Mind you, Cable and Deadpool can actually fuse into one person, though not in a pretty Steven Universe kind of way. They turn into a nightmarish mesh of struggling limbs, all because Deadpool once turned into a liquid and Cable drank him on purpose, mixing their DNA. Comics are weird, okay? Don’t even get me started on the time Cable was turned into a baby and Deadpool had to raise him, or when Cable turned completely metal in an alternative universe and had weird implied tentacle sex with a super emotional Deadpool. I read thought that whole thing and their story is long and complicated.
It’s no wonder that they couldn’t keep Deadpool’s and Cable’s romance a secret forever and eventually Reilly Brown (The artist for the later run of Cable & Deadpool and Split Second) just came out and confirmed it. A man can only keep an open secret like that for so long.
While everyone were on the Cable or Colossus train after watching Deadpool 2 (including me) I’ve seen people argue that Wade and Dopinder probably got it on in between Deadpool and Deadpool 2, or they might in the future.
It’s already established that they’re attracted to each other. Wade keeps talking about how handsome and cute he thinks Dopinder is, and Dopinder really likes Wade’s thighs. Dopinder doesn’t just want to kill, he wants to kill Wade’s enemies, and Wade doesn’t want Dopinder to get hurt despite not being too worried about adults’ safety in general. Literally no one calls Wade by a pet name besides Vanessa and Dopinder. During the taxi ride Wade started caressing Dopinder’s face and neck, and Dopinder acted like it was perfectly normal. In fact, he’s the only man who has never complained about Wade hitting on him.
So it does seem like Vanessa gave Wade her blessing to sleep with his “boyishly handsome” getaway driver. Their last words to each other in Heaven certainly seemed to suggest that they give each other free passes and no-nos.
I’m not sure there’s a place for Deadpool in the MCU.
The people Deadpool express attraction to in the movies.
I’ve seen people say comic Deadpool is a pansexual who prefer women but who’s most long-lasting and important relationship ended up being with a man, Cable. Movie Deadpool on the other hand seems to be a pansexual who prefer men but happened to fall completely in love with a woman, Vanessa. There might be something to that theory.
It’s pretty obvious that Colossus becomes Wade’s “replacement Vanessa” because he’s the only person who puts his foot down and insists on caring for Wade, so Wade kinda starts treating him like Vanessa because he misses her so much and doesn’t know what to do with all the love he still has for her.
Fun fact, Peter is a beekeeper so that might be why Wade calls him Sugar Bear. I’ve said before that Dopinder is the only man who never complained about Wade hitting on him, and that’s because Peter is too naive to notice such things so his lack of complaints doesn’t really count for much. For example, it’s pretty obvious from Peter’s twitter that his wife is cheating on him but he can’t tell.
I didn’t realize this, but someone pointed out that Dopinder shows a lot of signs of someone coming from a broken home where the parents were constantly fighting. When Deadpool and Cable fight in his taxi he is visibly distraught, and when they start fighting over HIM he looks like he’s about to cry. The whole thing is so upsetting to him that when Wade caress his face he starts to pull away but then changes his mind and push back into his hand, like he hates that they’re yelling at each other but he also likes when Wade pets him. He’s so damn conflicted and upset about the yelling and has to remind himself that they’re not his parents?
