biggest-gaudiest-patronuses:

biggest-gaudiest-patronuses:

melonmemes:

My stomach is itchy. Follow melonmemes on Instagram: http://www.instagram.com/realmelonmemes

LISTEN UP I AM SO FUCKING GREATFUL TO THIS POST

for years i’ve been thinking i fuckin imagined pink insulation. every fucking attic of every disgusting human abode i’ve visited has fucking yellow–YELLOW???–insulation

see, insulation and i, we go waaaay back.

i. i was a wee child. an innocent soul. and my new bedroom had a tiny attic. exciting! and the insulation was pink! and fluffy! and therefore obviously . harmly . because that is what all the social cues were t elling me fuck you..

and one day i discovered

i discovered. a. tunnel

that led from my tiny attic

to my sisters’ bedroom’s tiny attic

and that tunnel

i. i spelunked it

and yeah anyway it was midnight and i  jumped out of my sisters’ attic and they screamed unholy murder and it’s been 15 years they still haven’t forgiven that anyway

anyway i got micro glass inside every fuckin patch of skin and spent 2 weeks crying in the shower waiting for the pain to fade thank you for reading my post

i can still feel the horrid little tingles

i remember writing this but honestly for a year now i assumed that was a hallucination